Friday, July 24, 2009

Internet Love: Is It Possible?

So, it's been a minute since my last post. I just can't write to be writing. I have to be inspired, so I can give you quality, as opposed to quantity. Anyway...I was inspired by a discussion on Twitter, the other night.

During the course of the usual late-night fuckery, the question came up of, "have you had, or would have sex with someone you met on Twitter?" This sparked a bit of a friendly, courteous debate. Those of us who know, know those are few and far between, on social networking sites.

Initially, most people's responses to the question, predictably, were ranging from "no" to "hell no." Understandable, since no one wants to appear desperate.

So, you know I had to play "Devil's Advocate..."

I said that all of us, at one time or another, have had sex with someone we didn't know all that well. One-Night Stands, Booty Calls, and what have you, have touched most of us, in one way, or another. So, my question was, what really is the difference between meeting someone on the 'net, or meeting someone at the club/bar, and fucking them?

The responses (from males AND females) varied, from "people on the 'net are crazy" to "desperate people find love on the 'net." Last time I checked, these were "real life" issues, as well. Yoou don't know what you're getting, when you meet someone. This is why, when entering into a possible relationship with someone, in real life, or from the Net, we need to take our time. Really get to know the person. That's the way it was supposed to go down, from the beginning.

When you really get down to it, we take the same risks, often getting the same results. The person in the business suit that you met at the supermarket, or that nice bistro you like to go to, can be just as likely to be a psycho as the person you meet on the internet. It's all in how you prepare and cultivate your initial meeting & develop your friendship.

I'm not ashamed to say I've had sex with someone I met on the net. They were local, I got a good feel of who they were, before anything jumped off, and I protected myself when it did jump off. I would have done the same thing with anybody else I would potentially get nekkid with.

A different question is, "can you fall in love with someone from the net?" Again, I don't see why not, if you put in the work of getting to know the person. I will admit that the chances are slimmer, and you do have to put more effort into it. But, how many times have we seen success stories of people that met on the internet, and are happily married, to this day. So, I guess it could happen.

I guess what I'm saying is, while the internet carries a negative stigma, when it comes to romance, I wouldn't totally rule things out.

I would love to hear your experiences with meeting people from the 'Net. Don't be shy. You won't be judged in this house...and as always, it may not be correct, but...



  1. I've had relationships with people I've met online and fell in love. I was in a 2 year relationship and we actually took our time. A long time ago I would have been ashamed to admit that, but now I don't care. The relationship was a blessing at that time in my life, and I wouldn't change it for the world.

    Most people that act salty about it, have actually done it but it seems to be a desperate thing when u tell someone u did it. You run the same damn risk of getting a crazy one as u would in real-life so that therory is stupid. Like you said once you get to know someone whats the difference where you met.

  2. i met my fiancé online. we 'knew' each other online (yahoo, gmail) for several years before we even talked on the phone. after we began talking on the phone we decided to meet and subsequently started dating (long distance, 2 hr plane rides 1 to 2 times a month). we did the long distance thing for 2 years b4 he proposed and then we made plans for a move.

    i moved to his city in june and we get married next year. i think anything can work for the right two ppl.

  3. To me, the internet is just like going out to a club or whatever. Socail website, Tagged, I choose to be friends with females in my part of town. We communicate, exchange numbers and then meet. But not with everyone. Just like when you meet some one in person, you feel them out, thats what the profiles are for. I ask questions and most of my questions are straight to he point, "what are you looking for". I ask them to be honest in my emails, and take it from there with their rsponses. An online friendship that turns to a online relationship, to a friends in person, to a relationship in person takes time. Its not only guys who are looking for just one thing either. Some beauty queens thst I've met online, just want booty calls. As they say NSA, No Strings Attached. But after a while both parties may get bored, and move on. Its the moving on depends how your name, screen name gets spread around the net.Your breakup should be as frendly as when you met.

  4. I think for the most part the ones who judge "online relationships" are the ones who do not participate in social networking, whether it be facebook, myspace, twitter, or the many other social networks online. I have a couple of friends who just don't get online much, so they don't get how I have online "friends".

    I agree 100% that online is just like meeting any stranger and any given place, in both situations proceed with caution.

    I have actually met 2 guys from the internet(not during the same time period). I didn't set out to meet anyone, it just happened with casual conversation & we ended up clicking and becoming friends. It then moved to phone calls. The first guy lives in a town about an hour and a half north of mine. We hooked up once, and from there we decided to be just friends. I love him, he's a great friend. That was quite a few years ago. The other guy I met same situation, casual conversation, IMing, phone calls. He lives 3 hours north of my city. We went on a few dates, he came to see me, I went to see him. We really liked each other, but the distance was hard. If he was in the same city as me I think it could have been a long term relationship =[ But I'm still friends with him too.

  5. The internet!!! It's just a new way to make friends and connect with folks. I believe you can have very meaningful relationship with someone you meet on the net. The good thing about the net if done right you spend alot of time talking, sort of like a penpal, and people tend to open up as time progresses forming a solid friendship.

    You do need to take it slow though regardless. I am guilty of not taking it slow because we talked so much on the net. I wouldn't advise that route.

    I know quite a few folks who linked and got married after meeting on a dating site.

    Anything is possible.